I just got a master’s degree in networking, so I thought I’m sharing highlights from my thesis in this post. Well, it was a masters in business administration, but I did recruit for consulting roles. This meant over 6 hours a week talking to strangers, convincing them that I’d be a good colleague. In addition to that, I am an engineer, software developer and an Indian, all groups that don’t enagage in much small talk which is part of corporate America’s language.
Networking can seem intimidating, like it’s something you are born with and cannot acquire. There’s a lot I can do better today, but I have come a long way from where I began. I originally wrote these tips for a friend getting her PhD in Physics who was attending a conference and wanted advice on how to make connections. Hope they help you too.
General
Give your FULL name. People look you up.
Ask for a business card or email. People take their work inbox seriously, not their Linkedin DMs. Strongly prefer emails over “connecting” on Linkedin.
I send a Linkedin connection request immediately after my email. There’s not much I can say about myself in an email, so I want them to see my profile and take me seriously.
If you are not sending connection requests with a NOTE, you are not serious about that connection. In the above email follow-up example, I’d simply say - “Hey Ray, it was great meeting you last night. I just dropped you a note on email. Hope to hear from you”.
Note: Since I wrote the above point, Linkedin has doubled down on monetization and restricts numbe rof notes you can send (used to be unlimited). This will understandably limit you. I don’t normally recommend Linkedin premium, but if you are in a dedicated recruiting window, I would suggest you do, just for this feature.
FOLLOW-UP THE NEXT DAY. It’s like dating – email them too soon, and they’ll be a little surprised.
It’s physical, not just intellectual - They’ll decide if you’re worth talking to by looking at your confidence, posture, body language, eye contact, firmness of your handshake, the way you dress, what you’re saying, how you’re saying it, whether you’re simultaneously scanning the rest of the room to look for other more interesting people to speak to etc.
Even in prepared conversation, ask follow-up questions that aren’t on your list. In fact prefer them to the ones that are.
Be sure to let them know when you apply, and thank them for all their support as you prepared your application. This will be a signal for them to refer/vouch for you.
If you’ve formed a solid connection, ask for one.
Indirect ways of asking - Would love to be where you are. What would you have done if you were in my shoes? OR I feel like you are me 5 years ahead (if they have something in common w/ you), what would you do have the best shot at an interview?
For warm connections, make sure to jog their memory about what you have in common. Share about any big life events that may have occurred since you last interacted. If you ran a marathon, started business school, or got married, they may be more inclined to engage to congratulate you, and you can go from there!
Ask “do you recommend I speak to anyone else”. Depending on whom they connect you to/recommend you can gauge the NPS
Know a little bit about everything. Say you are trying to talk to Tejaswa, here are some topics you could use:
A past project that had a component that sounds like Tejaswa’s work.
A competitor that had a similar strategy as what Tejaswa’s company is trying to do.
High level disruptors’ impact on Tejaswa’s work. Eg Generative AI, interest rates, global supply chain congestion
Networking is not about impressing the person or understanding everything they/you do in one conversation.It’s about setting up common ground for a detailed conversation, later, about any of those things.
Networking is about doing a lot of little fake conversations, to find a few real ones you can have later.
The easiest way to network is to not talk about work, since:
They’ve been talking about it all night and are tired of it.
You might like to do more homework before talking about their work.
So talk about
How they’re liking Vegas (or wherever your conference is). Did you put down any money on the slots?
The hot springs you hiked to last weekend and how beautiful they were.
The keynote speaker’s message.
In a typical networking setup I’d want to move on in 10minutes or less. “Well it was great meeting you…”
For a good conversation: … let’s stay in touch. Do you want to connect on LinkedIn or have a business card (Email > LinkedIn)?
For a bad conversation: I’m going to get another drink,/find the restroom/check out the next session etc
I print a small QR code of my LinkedIn that’s on the back of my phone and diary. I’ve heard that you can also print 100 business cards at Staples for $20 if that’s what your industry prefers.
Avoid taking notes in any form in front of the other person, just be involved in the conversation.
If you have to take notes, make it super high level (go home and expand on it) and preferably in pen/paper and not with your phone in the corner.
Post event
If you didn’t get their email, you can usually figure it out from the way their company structures it. For example, mine is tejaswa.gavankar.2024@marshall.usc.edu.
If the person you want to connect with is of a higher level. You’ll want to also note something interesting from your conversation that you’ll use in your LinkedIn or email note. Here’s an example:
Hey Tejaswa, great meeting you last night. It was fun chatting about Rihanna’s Superbowl performance in the middle of all that Tech talk OR such a coincidence to find someone else who worked in/is from .. I’d love to know more about… Would you have time for a brief chat sometime this week/month. Here is my availability..
If you’re going to be networking often,
I’d highly recommend trying Calendly. I can’t believe that so many people don’t use it.
Have a database of some kind (I use Notion, excel is fine too)
When you suggest time slots, block them on your calendar tentatively so that you don’t end up getting double booked.